The Devil!

My coworker, Danielle, has lost a lot of weight and looks fabulous. I hate her, btw. We fell off the exercise wagon a few months ago and now we've started back up. I always said, "If ONLY I was on The Biggest Loser or rich and had my own personal trainer, like Jillian, yelling at me to move my arse!

Enter Danielle. Hello?! We make fun of the people in our parking lot doing lunges, remember? You know, those ladies who CAN afford their own personal trainer at the office in the building next to ours? Why did I send Danielle these links to what activities burn how many calories in an hour? Why is she sending numerous copies to print up on MY printer. "Look! We can jump rope at work for 10 minutes a day and burn 15 calories a minute!" So I'll be burning 30 calories.

I just sent her an IM, letting her know our boss just dropped off a box of 6 glazed Dunkin Donuts on my desk. They're not all for me. I'm supposed to share!! Of course, she ran up here to grab the box and take them away. Good thing she has heels on that make noise because I heard her coming and was able to snatch one heavenly, glazed donut as she ripped the box out of my hands.

I'm pretty sure I looked quite like a delicate flower of nature, when I tried to shove the entire donut in my mouth like a starving stray dog, fighing over a piece of kibble, before she could come over and dig it out of my pit bull like jaws. Not really. I took one bite and the look of sadness and pity on her face made me throw the donut in the garbage. "Get it out of the garbage and give it to me. I know you'll dig in there and eat it." O. M. G. AS IF! But then as I swallowed my one bite and returned from washing my hands, I actually thought, "Hey...I didn't think of that...it is MY garbage and it's just papers in there!" So really, it's her fault if anyone walks up here and my head is in the trash can.